(ROG) +[+++++] The special self wants to be in control of thoughts, whereas the basic self wants to serve them [draft]

Nothing seems to be good enough for the special self because it always seems to hear a voice whispering ´there must be more.´. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

The basic self does not understand, why the special self always wants to be affirmed by somebody else. It has no need for that itself because it is always vouched for by its maker, the brain, for following its instructions.

This is why it does not know, that confirmation is all the special self cares about and that it only chooses to be in relationships if it can lay down the rules, which first of all is that everything said and done by others should be an approval of how special it is.

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Although neither the special basic or self never causes anything, the special self fools itself into believing that it does by perceiving past events in such a way that it seems to have caused them.

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The special self is an expert in flattery. It is used to manipulate others into feeling appreciated and thus become so dependent on the compliments that they are willing to pay the price for being approved by the special self, which is to submit to it.

 

But neither the carrot or stick method work on the basic self. It has no need to belong to the world painted by the special self. On the contrary. It seems full of people who try to hide feeling small by creating a special world where they seem to be important.

The basic self has no motivation for being part of their special world based on dependency, so it is free to follow the commands of the brain and thus to be in the happiness that this induces.

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The special self needs to believe, that it can make things happen through manipulation of thoughts – for example by visualising them – as that makes it look like it is in control of its own life.

But it is like thinking the TV show you turn on by hitting the remote control is made by you. Someone else has made the show, and the only thing you can change is your perception of it. This is also the way the basic self seems to have been changed into a special self.

But even though the special self believes it is in charge of its own being, it does not feel alive. So it keeps on looking for somebody or something to make it feel that it exist. Most often it chooses to establish a family, that it can manipulate into give it the confirmation it needs. If this does not work out as intended, it may pay money to a psychologist or a guru for approving it to be a unique and independent being. And it does it realise how dependent it is on those supporting its perception of being independent.

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The basic self is all about the survival as someone definitive, whereas the basic self is all about serving. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

The special self is all about survival, whereas the basic self is all about serving.

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As the basic self follows the thoughts that are experienced to come from inside of it and to manifest a world outside of it, the experience of inside and outside is not perceived to make a difference.

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When the special self blames the basic self for being a victim of the brain, it is projecting its own need for the brain on the basic self, because the special self fights the brain, and what you fight you need. The basic self does not resist but serves the brain, which does not differentiate between its servant and itself, because the purpose of its mastery of the self is to serve it in the best possible way. Just like a parent wants to do what is in the best interest for its child.

The special self perceives everything so that it does not appear to be a servant but a master.

But since the special self does not want to be a servant, it makes sure to perceive the thoughts coming from the brain as if it is a master.

The special self likes be together with others, but on one condition, namely that others accept its perception, so that it shapes the relationship.

The shaping of thoughts into this perception can be quite nerve-racking, so the special self always looks forward to being free from thoughts, whereas the basic self feels free in the unedited flow of them.

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The basic self has no need to adjust thoughts, so they comply with special concepts of how to be together in harmony, balance and whatnot because it is in sync with the flow of thoughts coming from the brain. And as everything in a world where there seems to be more than one is created by that flow, it is always together with everything. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

When Alexius, whose basic self is a store-room manager – read more about that here – is travelling, the brain automatically registers the things passing by so they can be added to the map already established in his brain of the area. In other words, his joy does not come from watching the beauty of the scenery he is travelling through but from being in sync with his basic nature, by collecting and organising data.

The special self sees this as bad and that the brain should be stopped should be stopped doing this so that there are no thoughts of the past and the future to disturb it from enjoying the beauty of the scenery in the now. At least this is its official explanation.

But the real reason for stopping the natural activity of the brain is that when the special self perceives to do so through meditation, for example, thoughts seem to be held back and in an attempt to escape their imprisonment they appear to multiply in time. And the special self needs more thoughts than there is in the pool the of thoughts the brain has made for the basic self to make its own perception of the adventure it produces. Because many thoughts are needed to make up the speculative concepts of living in the now, coming from the heart and whatnot.

It does not want all of the thoughts that it seems to generate. Those judged as wrong, which in this context could be the thoughts of ugliness, it excludes, so that it seems to be in the beauty of the now. But as nothing can be experienced without something to contrast it, there is no beauty to experience without ugliness. The thoughts judged as ugly, therefore, come back and seem to engage in a fight between good and evil, and it is not joy but confusion that arises from that.

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The special self always tries to exclude what it judges as negative in the expectation that it will be more loved when seen as positive. It is not positivity, though, but exclusivity that it is adored for, as that seems to confirm separation and therefore all those believing to be special as independent beings.

Some of them, however, perceive themselves to be more special than others, so they form groups that fight each other about what is wrong. Not very often though do they have an alternative to what they have deemed wrong. It is more critical for them to have a common enemy because that gives them a feeling of being united with their group without having to give up the belief in separation because that is kept alive through the shared hatred of the enemy.

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To define something as small, there must also be something tall. The special self, however, always tries to exclude one side of a contrast. It wants love but not hate and positivity but not negativity, for example. The special self, therefore, excludes hate and negativity from itself by projecting it on others. But as you cannot experience one side of a contrast without the other, the avoidance of one of them includes its contrast. In other words, if you exclude hate, you also exclude love, so the love you believe to experience is purely speculative. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Since it is not possible to alter the stream of thoughts that the self receives from the brain, its consciousness breaks away from it by first perceiving the stream in such a way that it seems to have made by itself. Then it, like a god, says »Here is my world.« And Bam! The world as it perceives it appears to be there. Next, it says, »I am alive independently of the brain.´ And Bam! Its perception is put on the Statute Book.

Third, it builds a character with a few flaws, so it always has something to make better through meditation or other techniques where it seems to be in control and thus in charge of its own life, which makes it feel that it is special.

Experiencing to be special is a bit like thinking so much of someone, that everyone is experienced to be your chosen one. The illusion though is broken when you take a closer look.

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The special self feels controlled by the natural flow of thoughts coming from the brain. Yet it is totally dominated by what its own perception of a better world dictates it to do and think.

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The function of the brain is to create thoughts to entertain the self that it has fabricated, so if the thoughts coming from it do not seem to please but frustrate the self, its consciousness most likely has made a perception of them, so they do not comply with the flow but the speculative concepts of spiritualism, capitalism or another ism meant to make the self feel that it belongs to something better.

But since this perception is based on a specific system, the movements of the thoughts making it up is limited by the concepts of it. This does not bring about amusement but frustration. Nor does it bring about the peace your specific system promises but stress and confusion because, in an attempt to break out of your restrictive perception, the thoughts you have compiled for keeping it together expand and move faster and faster.

No worries, if you do not try to stop this the restless energy, it ignites a take-off to the empty breath, where the slate is wiped clean for all misperceptions so that you only need the few thoughts it takes to make a perception that is in sync with the script of the brain.

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Every time there seem to be thoughts doubting each other, you can be sure you are out of sync with the script of the brain. Not in the way you act, because you are not free to change that, but in the way you perceive it.

This is easily corrected though. You just try different perceptions. The one that makes you feel entertained is in sync with the script of the brain. As it is never too late to change your perception of the past, you can have had the best childhood ever. Read more about that in hack # 1.3 You cannot change the world, but you can change your perception of it.

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Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

To uphold the image of itself as a positive person, the special self avoids feeling what it perceives as negative by hiding it in the body. And to make sure nobody discovers it still contains those emotions – for example, sexual lust, power strivings, selfishness, greed, envy, anger and rage – it projects them onto the others.

But since everything in the script of the brain comes in pairs, positivity cannot be experienced without its contrast, negativity, and vice versa. Thus the suppression of negative emotions does not turn the special self into a positive person but someone living in denial and therefore out of sync with the script of the brain.

Willingness to feel the emotions that seem to scare us reveals that they are not something but nothing. Just like the sounds, you hear when walking on a dark and empty street, do not scare you anymore when you look around and see it is just the wind playing with the leaves.

But if the feelings perceived as negative are not avoided, they do not seem to scare but assure you, because combined they are two halves that make a whole, and what is whole feels amusing. So does the feeling of being happy sad, that may arise from having lost the interest in the relations that were based on the former exclusion.

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Contrary to the basic self, whose appearance changes with the natural flow of thoughts coming from the brain in ways that do not necessarily look consistent, the appearance of the special self always seems to be persistent.

This is not because the special self is different from the basic one, but because it has another perception of itself, which has been pushed to override the natural flow of thoughts coming from the brain.

To make sure its perception defines it, the special self talks much about selected thoughts and/or emotions and sets up its surroundings to imitate them via music, candles, incense and red wine, for example. But it remains theoretical. The special self avoids feeling what it is talking about because it is afraid it is not going to be what it has imagined.

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A dream only seems real, when you believe to be someone definitive doing something specific in its world. The same applies to your appearance as someone in a world where there seems to be more than one. It is all make-believe. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

If you try to solve absent-mindedness by mindfulness meditation or grounding exercises, the problem is not solved but enhanced, because you do not know how to take care of yourself. But your maker does, and as that is the brain, the solution, in the context of believing to be someone, is to hook up with the stream of thoughts coming from the brain, instead of using meditation to distance yourself from it. Read more about that here.

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When you do not argue with the gamemaster in a role-play, you feel entertained by following the rules.

You do not even have to care about returning to that which is real because the gamemaster knows that being in its game is all make-believe.

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Social media is a system based on clicks, likes and sharing. The more a post enhances hate and separation, the more it is clicked, liked and shared and, therefore, helps the special self in spreading fake news and the basic lie, that you are someone substantial in a tangible world. It has been so widespread that it is believed to be a fact, although science states the world we experience as substantial consists of empty space.

The glorification of separation also helps advertisers to make more money on social media – especially because most believing to be a separated being tries to solve their loneliness by buying something comforting.

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If one of the many lies of the special self is exposed, it never relates to the revelation but ignores it and diverts the focus from itself by making up a new lie about being unjust attacked.

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The basic self fabricated by the brain seems quite dull compared to how exciting its consciousness imagines it can become if it is in control of it. But as this fantasy of a better self is just a manipulated version of the basic self, that the brain has fabricated from out of nothing (read more about that here), it is the same emptiness made to look as if it is something.

And yet this emptiness shaped by the consciousness seems to have more worries – especially about dying – than the emptiness shaped by the brain, who full of confidence follows the brain to the very end, where it returns to the nothingness from which a thought of something once seemed to arise and materialise itself as a brain capable of making more thoughts from nothing and compile them, so they appear to manifest a tangible world with substantial appearances.

Returning to nothing there is not something appearing to hide there never was and never will be anything but that which is one since it is formless and therefore nor has a beginning or an end.

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Feeling empty undoes the belief in being someone because there is nothing in emptiness, so there is not something to define you.


NOTE: This article is part of hack #4.2 The basic self versus the special one, which is still in the process of being written.