[+] To be depressed or blissed [draft]

It is essential for the special self to make selected ones feel unique so that they become dependent on the special self to feel this.

As happiness comes from being inclusive, the exclusion of negative thoughts or anything else does not bring about happiness but sadness. And no matter what special diet or philosophies you follow to solve this, nothing is resolved until what has been excluded is included.

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The special self is a modified version of the basic one invented by its rebellious consciousness in an attempt to liberate it from the perceived tyranny of the brain. This is not possible, but it is possible to make up a perception of the self as if it is an independent being by excluding everything from the perception that does not support this.

Being exclusive, however, the special self never feels fulfilled, whereas the basic self always feels complete, because it never excludes anything.

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Since the basic self is in sync with the stream of thoughts as they come from the brain and therefore automatically is induced with shots of happiness, it has no need to be or achieve something special to feel good. The special self, on the other hand, always tries to find special moments from its past that it can replicate in the present, and thus makes it feel that it still is special.

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The special self always finds something that it judges to be wrong and caused by others, so they become the imperfect background for its perfect self.

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When the special self perceives to have failed in being primary, it takes on the role of secondary. Thus the failure does not seem to have been caused by itself but somebody else.

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The special self needs to convince at least one person about how crucial it is, which it achieves by smothering someone with the kind of attention it senses, that is required to make that person feel chosen. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

If you make a perception of specific parts in the experiences produced by the brain that seems to capture, stop or change them, your perception becomes sticky and you, therefore, inflexible.

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Nothing in a dream can be changed by the one you believe to be but the perception of it. So though you do not have any control over the events in a dream that you appear to have, it is you who decide to perceive fear, for example, so it seems sticky and not just a fleeting feeling. Likewise when you experience to be someone substantial in a tangible world.

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The special self wants to make others believe, it has something rare that will help them get closer to their core, from where they can control life and mould it, so they feel fulfilled. But the life you experience in a world where there seems to be more than one is no more controllable than the life you experience in the world of a dream, as life is oneness and it takes more than one to control something. Besides, for the very same reason, there is no life in a world where there seems to be more than one.

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Again and again, the special self likes to show off as someone who has had extraordinary experiences which resulted in invaluable insights that is helpful to those it judges to not have it and need to be transformed. But it is just a trick to cover up, that it wants is to control others so they can be changed into something that serves its needs. Since this is no more possible than to be in control of those in the world of a dream, the special self pieces together an interpretation of its interaction with others, which in retrospect establishes itself as someone that everything revolves around.

Though it may not be able to manipulate a lot into believing that this is so, it often succeeds in shaping at least one person into accepting it by making this person feels so wanted and loved, that it thinks it cannot live without the one making it feels so unique.

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The special self likes to hide its loneliness by making somebody dependent upon it. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

The special self needs alcohol, drugs meditation or something else mind-numbing to escape the fear of repercussion that its control entails.

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If the special self discovers that others have interpreted something it did as wrong, it avoids feeling guilty by shouting »Look what you made me do.«

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First Alexius thought his feared was caused by his father who often burst out in anger and beat him in his childhood. Next, he thought he caused his fear because he was so afraid of not being good enough. Then he stopped looking for a cause. And as there is no effect without a cause, there is no fear anymore. Read more about cause and effect in the hack No Cause = No Effect = No Karma, which you can find in Extra Duality hacks.

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Most like to believe, that the thoughts produced by the brain are evil. But it is the attempt to stop or edit them that is evil because. It highlights you as someone in charge of something instead of just a happy binary code of nothing.

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If the special self takes an interest in so-called spirituality, it has to be something where it can use a specific technique to become more relaxed, for example, without going with the flow because it is constantly looking for ways to become and get more without losing its perceived control.

Always being busy though does not have to be a problem, because when stress is not controlled, it ignites a take-off to the empty breath* and the bliss of not-knowing* what and where you are.

But as the self-perception of the special self is built upon knowing what it is, it rejects what would make it relax, namely the bliss of not-knowing.

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When not perceiving what you appear to be and do as if it is something, you are nobody doing nothing and thus not somebody who is hiding, there is no more than the formlessness of oneness.

Being connected with the empty breath* feels like sinking into water and float in the nothingness of bliss. See also What does ´the empty breath´ feel like?.

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In a state of not-knowing,* you are nobody. This you cannot want to be because to want something you must be somebody. But you can want not to be somebody.

Not being somebody, there is nobody to respond to the thoughts coming from the brain, which falls into a coma, if it does not have an internal communication with somebody for more than 20 minutes, 45 at the most. Thus the wish to continuously go around as nobody is as foolish as to be living in the now, for example, and thus just another way to appear more special than others.

That being said, when you return from a state of not-knowing* your slate has been wiped clean for all perceptions so new ones automatically are in sync with the script of the brain until you make an effort to change this. In other words, you return as the basic self and remain effortlessly like that until you make an effort to be special.

Perceiving yourself to be special you are out of sync with the script of the brain, but you can use the frustration that this entails igniting another take-off the empty breath* and its blissful state of not knowing and again return to the consciousness of being someone with the slate wiped clean and thus feel renewed as the basic self.

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Not perceiving yourself as special, you feel free and feathery since nothing has to be altered or rejected to fit a particular image, contrary to perceiving yourself as special. That feels heavy and tiresome because it takes so much time and effort to invent a special image from which selected experiences are eliminated or changed, so you appear to be absent of power strivings, selfishness, greed, anger, negative thoughts or whatever you assume to be politically incorrect.

Since everything in a world of duality comes in pairs and the special self exclude the apparently dark side of those in its perception of what is going on, it the energy of duality is not expressed but held back. And even though the special self never feels it has enough energy and, therefore, would like to release it, it holds back because it is afraid that it is going to be devoured the moment it loses its control.

It is in the right about this. The uncontrolled energy of suppressed feelings ignites a take-off to the empty breath,* where the self disappears into the nothingness from where it seemed to have arisen. Thus all that is left is the bliss of emptiness.

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In a state of not-knowing,* there is no sense of separation or union, as they are concepts based on the belief in separation. There is nothing but the bliss of that comes from not judging the apparent differences to make a difference. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Entering a state of not-knowing* is like falling down into the body. Not in the sense that you become more physical or that higher frequencies are incorporated. You do not become more of anything, nor do you integrate something, because falling down in the body you grasp it is nothing and the experience of it as something substantial in a tangible world is a fantasy, including the one who believes to be experiencing it. This is not sensed, however, while in a state of not-knowing,* because in this state there is nobody to be aware of anything, nor how blissful it is to not be conscious of something.

Hence everything said in Alexius´ Enlightened Non-Teachings about a state of not-knowing* is based on the memories that pop up about it after Alexius has returned to the consciousness of being someone definitive. This includes that the experiences of a world that seem to be outside of him goes on in a state of not-knowing,* but there is nobody to judge the apparent different elements to make a difference, wherefore there is nothing to confirm the belief in separation.

Although a state of not-knowing* is impersonal, the memories of it are personal, so you may remember it in another way. Just like two persons drinking the same tea probably describe it in each their own way, although the tea is the same.

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It is not possible to return to that which is one. Nor is it possible to leave it, as it is formless and, therefore, inseparable.

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A state of not-knowing* is not revealing that which is one, but that a world where there seems to be more than one is nothing. And the result of this revelation is not that you choose to return to that which is one as that requires more than one but that you return from a state of not-knowing* to the consciousness of being someone in a world where there seems to be more than one as a basic self.

Being a basic self, you sooner or later are so happy that you forget to choose and since not choosing does not require more than one, the enlightenment of that which is one is bid welcome. See hack #5-7.1 From the inner senses through a black hole into that which is one.

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The application of one or more of the duality hacks does not produce anything but the bliss of nothingness. That is if you do not catch onto something specific, because anything definable always brings about depression.

Since it takes more than one to be in any state, the above does not apply to the enlightenment of that which is one (hack #5-7.1 From the inner senses through a black hole into that which is one). It does not entail bliss or anything else that requires more than one.

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The moment you stop relating, you go into a state of not-knowing. You stop relating when you do not care about what and where you appear to be because then no relation is needed to establish you as someone definitive.

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The transition to a state of not-knowing, which can last from a split second to several days, may not seem pleasant. The brain tries to distract you from leaving its definable world by producing very tangible and disturbing experiences, like if ants crawl on your body, for instance, so that you feel attacked and thus to be someone definitive. See also If included irritation undoes the belief in duality.

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Your special perception of the world divided into good and evil makes you feel lonely because they are based on you being better than others and thus separated from them. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Be aware, that there is absolutely no will to perceive anything in a state of not-knowing* as something special. Nor will the transition from a state of not-knowing* to the conscious of being someone be noticed since you are not aware of being in a state of not-knowing.*

Returning to the consciousness of being someone definitive, you may not remember having been in a state of not-knowing. Nevertheless, you feel good because your slate has been wiped clean and perceptions that are in sync with the script of the brain are therefore automatically generated.

But if the happiness that this entails is felt to be too basic compared to the vague memories of bliss that sooner or later pop up from your state of not-knowing,* you may try to twist the automatically generated perceptions, so they seem to reflect an awakening caused by a divine intervention and/or special powers of yours where you rose in the bliss of now – or whatever you imagine will make you special in the eyes of others..

If not having used the memories of bliss to make a perception of yourself as if you are special, you could have remained the happy self for years to come with the basic perception that it is what it is, you chose to extract everything not supporting you as a special and independent person. This image of being unique may seem to give you a better status in the world, but as something is missing in the image of yourself, the price is that you never feel good enough.

You could have remained a happy self for years to come if not editing the perception that automatically is made of the script of the brain. From this perception, that basically says that it is what it is, you chose to extract everything not supporting you as a special and independent person. This image of being unique may seem to give you a better status in the world, but as something is missing in the image of yourself, the price is that you never feel good enough.

In other words, if you stick with the automatically generated perceptions when you return from a state of not-knowing* to the consciousness of being someone, you get the happiness that comes from being the basic self with the knowledge, that this self is an illusion made from out of nothing.

Should you forget that and, therefore, start perceiving nothing as something, the frustration that this causes can be used to ignite a take-off to the empty breath* and thus again have the slate wiped clean in a state of not-knowing,* so you can return to the consciousness with the perception that it is what it is.

There may be several days in a row where you go back and forth between a state of not-knowing* and the consciousness of being someone definitive. These days may be so intense that it feels like you cannot make it, but by including whatever pops up of hidden issues, they vanish, and you do not think of how to make it because the old problems are not there to hunt you anymore.

There are probably also many days, where you do not go back between a state of not-knowing* and the consciousness of being someone definitive but remain in the latter. No worries. You know it is just a game. When playing it by the rules, it is like a mirage that becomes tangible although there is nothing there.

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The special self always looks for something to do right, so it does not feel wrong. Photo © Alexius Jorgensen.

Returning from a state of not-knowing* to the conscious experience of being a basic self you probably feel so entertained that you forget the bliss of not being conscious, and when you finally remember you may feel guilty about it having forgotten it. No worries. Feeling guilty is also entertaining if you do not try to do something about it. Not doing that, the uncontrolled energy of it ignites a take-off to the empty breath,* which indifference to the brains experiences that you perceive as something reveals them as nothing. Read more about that here.

As it takes the brain one second to create the conscious experience of something from out of nothing the empty breath* takes you back one second in linear time. Thus you are in the gap between nothing and something and, therefore, in the bliss of not perceiving the experiences of the brain as something, until you again return to the conscious experience of being a basic self. This time, however, you may remember what and where you believe to be is nothing and so is feeling guilty.

Before you get to this point, you probably have been going back and forth between a state of not-knowing* and the consciousness of being someone definitive many times and the latter may have contained much unrest and days where you hardly could keep awake. No problem. Time is nothing.

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In the apparent transition from something to nothing, it may feel like being in a cage that cannot be escaped. Not because there is a cage. What you believed to be is not disguised as something anymore but exposed as the nothingness it always was. As the feeling of claustrophobia, therefore, cannot be hidden it is also exposed as nothing and so is any other feeling until there are no feelings at all, only that which cannot be felt, namely that which always was and will be since it is endless. In other words, the formlessness of oneness.


*) Read about the empty breath and a state of not-knowing in the below hacks

All duality hacks, except the enlightenment of that which is one, brings about a state of not-knowing so you can pick any one or more as you like to undo the belief in duality. However, HACK #3, Not being exclusive but inclusive is freedom from being someone definitive probably talks the most about a state of not-knowing.


NOTE: This article is part of hack #4.2 The basic self versus the special one, which is still in the process of being written.

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  1. […] a take-off to the empty breath, because it only takes one second for it to wipe the slate clean (read more about that here) and restore you as the basic self. For this to work, you do not have to understand the exposed […]

  2. […] energy for a take-off to the empty breath, as it only takes it one second to wipe the slate clean (read more about that here), so you are restored as the basic self, which feels as if you are renewed. You do not even have to […]